Love Isn’t Easy: Chapter 3
I couldn’t believe that I had just kissed Eric. I was shocked at how brazen I’d been. I had never done anything even remotely like that before. But boy it sure felt good. The rest of the night, I stayed away from him. I did notice that he was watching me from across the room sometimes and it made me kind of weak in the knees. As it got late and people started to leave, I climbed the stairs to go to Bill’s room. I noticed that Eric watched me and I also noticed that there were three beautiful girls sitting on the sofa with him hoping to be his companion for the night. When I had sex with Bill that night, I closed my eyes and imagined that he was Eric. That made me feel so sexy that the sex was much better than usual. I was insatiable. After Bill fell asleep I stared at the ceiling and listened to Eric having sex with his girl dujour in the next room. I was envious but I was also so incredibly turned on. I made sure Bill was still sleeping before I snuck my hand under the covers and gave myself an orgasm while listening to Eric’s moans. I wished that I were the girl in his bed.
After that kiss, it killed me to watch Sookie going upstairs to sleep with Bill. I stayed downstairs for awhile just so I wouldn’t have to listen to them together. All I could think about was how badly I wanted her in my bed. Then I couldn’t take it any longer and grabbed the hand of the girl beside me and took her upstairs and fucked her blind. I laughed at myself later because when I came I actually had to slap my hand over my mouth to keep from calling out Sookie’s name.
Sookie didn’t come over as much after that night. Or if she did, it wasn’t when I was home. I wondered if she was avoiding me, hoping that the kiss meant something and maybe she was considering breaking up with Bill. But then it became evident that they weren’t breaking up and it was more likely that she was regretting the kiss and being around me made her uncomfortable. Shit.
Bill was at home without Sookie quite a bit during that time and his old girlfriend, Lorena, started hanging out at the house some. I never liked her much even though I didn’t really know her. She was just kind of a loudmouth type and very crass. She hit on me a few times, and one night I actually let her into my room when she knocked, but then I decided that she was just not worth the trouble. I don’t turn down no-strings blow jobs very often, I have to tell you. That shows just how much I didn’t like her. I thought it was pretty tacky really of Bill to have her around. It’s not like they were good friends like Pam and I are. Lorena was definitely still interested in getting Bill into bed and didn’t mind who knew it. I wondered if Sookie knew that she was hanging around.
After that night–the one with the kiss behind the convenience store–I stopped going to Bill’s so much. I just couldn’t take being around Eric. I was so attracted to him and knew that it was just an impossible situation. I really loved Bill and didn’t want to mess up what we had by throwing myself at his housemate—his impossibly sexy and yet ridiculously promiscuous housemate that was definitely not relationship material. He was fuck buddy material. Only I didn’t want to be his fuck buddy. I wanted to be his girlfriend. Damn it.
One night during midterms I was over at Bill’s studying. Eric wasn’t home, thank goodness. I’d stayed up later than usual on the sofa with Bill. He decided to go upstairs to go to sleep, and I decided that I would join him soon even though it was a Thursday night and I rarely slept over there during the week. But I was tired and didn’t want to take the time to drive home. I kept some clothes in my car just for such occasions. I don’t know what time it got to be, but at some point I woke up and I was asleep on the sofa. I decided to call it a night and went up to get ready for bed. Once I had washed my face and brushed my teeth, I crawled into bed with Bill. But then I was wide awake again and lay there staring at the ceiling while Bill slept soundly beside me. My thoughts naturally drifted to the Sookie-magnet of a man that may or may not be in the next room. I wondered if he had come home while I was sleeping on the sofa, and since it was a week night, I wondered if he might be alone. I watched Bill to make sure he was in a deep sleep and then slipped out of bed and into the robe that Bill kept there for my use.
Eric’s door was closed and I carefully turned the knob so that it wouldn’t make a sound and tip-toed into the room after closing the door behind me. He was asleep and he was alone. And he was naked. Oh my god. He was lying on his stomach and the sheet only came up to the backs of his thighs. I had always considered Eric’s eyes to be his best feature, but this view made me change my mind. I carefully and silently moved to stand closer to him. I studied his body, the muscles in his back and arms and that spectacular ass. I knew that it was wrong to look at him like this without his consent, but that just made it all the more exciting. I wanted to touch him, but instead I opened my robe and began to touch myself. It was the most erotic experience I’d ever had, watching Eric sleeping and stroking myself, feeling how wet I was at the sight of him. My other hand was pulling on my nipple. I was trying to control my breathing so that it wouldn’t wake him. I could feel my heart beating and knew that I was getting close to coming. Suddenly, he moved. I froze. He rolled over kind of onto his side, facing me and put his hand on the most beautiful and biggest erection I had ever seen. My jaw dropped and suddenly I wanted nothing more than to move his hand away and replace it with my mouth. He still seemed to be fast asleep, so I continued what I was doing with my hands. I was so close, never taking my eyes off of him. I was just about to come when I decided that I couldn’t take it any longer and I was just going to touch him and wake him up and make love to him. And then I heard Bill whispering my name in the hallway. I stopped and listened. He walked down the steps to the living room. I quickly closed my robe and ran out of Eric’s room, closing the door behind me. I dashed into Bill’s room and frantically started putting my clothes on.
I walked downstairs and Bill was standing by the sofa in the dark and said, “What are you doing?”
“You know what. I decided that I should just go home after all. I’ve still got a lot to read and I was thinking I might just need to pull an all-nighter. I’m sorry if I woke you.”
“That’s okay, but where were you?”
“Hmm?” I was putting my books into my bag.
“Just now. Where were you?”
“Oh, just upstairs. I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay? Night.” I gave him a quick peck on the lips and headed out to my car. Good lord, that was close. Was I out of my mind? What was I thinking? I really needed to get it together and behave myself. I couldn’t believe how close I had just come to doing something very very wrong.